Jo Dee Messina: Day 2 on the Fix, 'No one said it would be east, but it will be worth it'

Hello team members, 

Hell of a day today.  For those of you who struggle through this challenge I want you to come back and read this entry whenever that happens.  

I woke up at 3:45 to catch a 4 hr flight to Salt Lake City for a show tonight.  First thing I did was have a cup of coffee.  I didn’t want to eat breakfast until I got to the airport and I knew because it was going to be such a long day, I wanted to save Shakeology for afternoon snack to have energy for show. 

We got to the airport at 5:45.  Checked in all the gear and then went through security.  I was so excited that I wasn't’t stopped for the Nonfat Greek Yogurt and salad dressing ( in orange container ).  While we were waiting to board, at 6:20, I had snack.  Apple and Almonds.  I was saving “breakfast” for the flight (it was 4 hours)   On the flight I slept, though.  I think most of us did. 

When we landed in Salt Lake, I turned on my phone while still on the plane.  I saw that I missed a call from both my sisters and I had a text from my brother that said “Call when you can”.  I knew right that something was going on with my family. I called my brother, and as if he was reading test results from a page, (very little compassion) he told me my Mothers sister had died this morning at 9:30am EST.  

 As the guys loaded luggage onto van, I hung on the phone not saying anything. My Aunt and my mom were crazy close their entire lives.  They just talked on the phone the other day.  I would call my Aunt when my mother was confused and she could always bring my mother back with funny stories of their childhood or encouraging words. She was so Cute, funny and feisty. She seemed invincible. After we all got into van I called my cousin PJ.  I just saw him a couple months ago for a taping of American Idol.  You may know his son, Alex Preston, from American Idol.  He placed in the top three this year. When PJ answered the phone it took all I had not break down.  My throat was tight, my eyes welling with tears behind my sunglasses. I managed to squeak out "PJ, I am so sorry".  I couldn't really speak after that. I was doing the “silent cry” where you run out of air, and tears poor down your face.  He told me he was still in shock as this was unexpected. The rest of the family was just getting there and he stepped out to get my call.  I told him to go back and be with the family and fill me in on information for services.     

When I hung up the phone I tried my best not to break down.  I was in a van filled with my employees and a man from the local radio station.  No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't help it. I put my hand over my mouth hoping that my sweatshirt would keep any noise from being heard.  Then, I wept out loud into my sweatshirt covered arm. Tears pouring down my face from behind my glasses. My Aunt was precious to me and she knew it. She came to Nashville to live with my mother and help with my fan club for a few years.  I remember taking her to a CMA event and she walked on the bus with a 20 something guy she was dancing with (totally innocent. She was just a cute little old lady). Before I toured Australia, she ended up in the emergency room to have her gallbladder removed. I had someone take my stuff to the airport so I could sit with her until the very last minute I could, before I had to catch my flight...And now she’s gone.  My mothers last living sibling.  Her younger sister.  How will my mother respond when she hears? Will she realize what’s going on? I will be home tomorrow, but, she’s going to find out today.  A million thoughts going through my head. 

We got to the venue and I swallowed hard trying to stop crying.  Stepped out of the van and into trailer backstage.  No one said anything. My band guys know me so well, I swear they can feel when something is not right. It could have been my boo hoo-ing in the van that was a giveaway, but they were talking among themselves, so I’m not sure if they heard me.  

All of this to say I  DID NOT WANT TO WORKOUT TODAY !!!! My heart is broken. So sad. I wanted to crawl up into a ball just drown in my sadness. 

I made myself put on my running clothes. 'Went through the motions', fastening my watch, putting my iPod on, and walked out the door.  Still in shock, I started my 30 minute run. I won’t lie and tell you it was easy, or that I didn’t stop. About 1/2 way in, I was running through a park and stopped to allow myself a moment to break down and cry. Then back at it.  I finished my run, got back to venue and got a ride to the hotel where I DRUG MYSELF downstairs to the gym to do the 21 Day Upper Body Fix. 1/2 hr. That’s all I needed to focus on.  Just ONE HALF OF AN HOUR. 

I was glad I got my workout done. I had to join Kat on the tail end of a couple exercises, but that’s why she’s there. I didn’t stop. After that I had the time to be sad. Then it was hair and makeup trying desperately not to cry once my eye makeup was on. Meet and Greet, then show. I actually got to meet some folks from beachbody sales dept. They were totally awesome. They joked about me having my little blue container on the counter. I used it to carry my salad dressing.  ;-)

When you feel like you just can’t do it...it’s just 30 minutes.  The length of a t.v. show. Push through. Even in sadness there will be this little part of you that’s proud you pushed through. 

here’s what I did today:

3:50 am-Coffee

arrive airport 5:45


6:20 am-Almonds and apple

Slept on plane until 11:20

11:20 am-Coffee

12:20 pm-Egg whites and avocado 

1:15 30 minute run
3:00 Upper body fix

3:45 pm-Turkey burger with kale / pepper salad

7:00 pm-Spinach /kale salad with broccoli, onions, peppers, chicken, seeds and dressing

9:30 show

11:00 pm- boiled egg

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Recipe Thursday: Fall Detox Vegetable Soup

21 Day Fix Quinoa & Black Bean Salad

What a Day of Meals Looks Like on the 3-Day Refresh.