Best Year Ever! So why do I feel lost?

2015 was a big year for me. I had set out to make it the year of stepping out of my comfort zone. I am happy to say that I didn’t just step out of it, I blew that comfort zone away. I made gains in my business, in my personal growth, and toward my goals. I got to perform on stage in a stadium full of people, created a nutrition app called Custom Eats, and rank advanced my business. On paper it would seem as if I had the best year of my life, but what’s on paper doesn’t tell the whole story.

Although 2015 was my most amazing year to date, it was also one of my most crippling years. It’s important to remember what you see on facebook or ‘on paper’ is just the highlight reel, but like anything in life it takes constant struggle and failure to move toward success. 2015 was filled with steps forward and steps backward…found love and lost love…met goals and failed goals, but most importantly it was filled with life.

By September of 2015 I should have felt like I was on top of the world, like I was going to make it, living the dream…because I was…but that is not how I felt. I felt as if something was missing…as if I was lost. I struggled with this feeling. I struggled because here I was someone who people looked to for advice on personal growth, and I was feeling lost. I felt like a failure…that is when I realized that I wasn’t a failure at all, as long as I used this feeling to fuel growth and inspire change.

You see, feeling this way is not a bad thing…it is a human thing. There are two directions you can take when you are feeling unfulfilled or lost. You can do absolutely nothing and continue to feel that way, or you can dig deep, get to the root of the issue, and take action toward changing it. I am not someone to just sit around and do nothing, so I decided to take action. How? Well, by taking a little spiritual growth journey of course!

Don’t get me wrong I am more than ready to take 2016 by storm, but that is because I know where I need to grow and improve. Part of that is digging deep and finding what it is that is causing me to feel lost. 

I am lucky. I am lucky because I have the ability to do my job from anywhere at anytime. That is one of the main reasons I do what I do. I love to work, but on my own terms in my own way. So I decided that when it gets all cold and depressing up here in Boston during the month of January, that I would take my spiritual journey. My plan? To visit lots of old friends out on the West Coast, meet as many people as possible, get comfortable with being alone, and get uncomfortable by getting to know strangers. I am going to end my trip in L.A. where I will visit Lake Shrine to do some meditation. I had visited Lake Shrine several years ago and returned home feeling alive and revived.

Even the most successful people on this earth don’t have it 100% together 100% of the time. What do they do that is different from all of the unsuccessful people? They use their failures as lessons, they constantly grow, better themselves, and learn…and they realize that imperfection is what makes them human.

I will be blogging throughout my trip. I can’t promise that it will be entertaining, but I invite you all to join me for my journey. Follow me here on this blog, on Instagram @jaimemessina, or on snacpchat.