The Crab Mentality: Don't let them pull you to your death!
Have you heard of the crab mentality? It's also known as crabs in a bucket...and refers to what happens when crabs are actually in a bucket awaiting their death. It's strikingly similar to the behavior of human beings when we see one of our own doing big things or moving forward in life. You see, what happens is, when you have a bucket of crabs waiting to be cooked, or who knows what, they are all frantically trying to figure out what the hell is going on and how to get out. As soon as a crab starts to make their way to the top to crawl out of the bucket and save themselves, the other crabs pull him back down, "if I can't have it, neither can you".
The analogy in human behavior is that members of a group will attempt to reduce the self-confidence of any member who achieves success beyond the others, out of envy, spite, conspiracy, or competitive feelings, to halt their progress.
I see this all too often in coaching. I have challengers who made a tough decision to begin their fitness journey who are constantly ridiculed, and tempted by friends and family members. I see coaches who join my team who face the same ridicule just for going after their passion, and goal to improve their lives and the lives of others. Ideas, goals, thoughts, all shot down by the people closest to them with reasons of why they can't succeed. I'll be honest, it pisses me off!
I remember facing the same obstacles when I first started. I almost quit many times...by the grace of God I was given the strength to ignore the naysayers and continue my journey and thank the lord I did. If I hadn't, I would still be battling major depression. I would still be in a job that made me feel worthless. I would still be haunted by thoughts of taking my own life. Instead, I am here present on this Earth in a way I had never imagined. I feel more than I have ever felt, I'm excited about my life, and am serving the universe in a way that makes me feel purpose. If I had listened to those crabs and let them pull me back into that bucket of hell, I would not be who I am today.
You know, I feel bad for those crabs in the bucket that try to pull you down. They know not what they do...they don't feel the spark that you feel inside, they have given up and accepted where they are in life and if they are trying to pull you down it means that they aren't truly happy with what they have accepted. It's crucial in the beginning of whatever journey you are on to focus...don't let others get in your head, as for advice only from trusted sources, and if you believe in your soul that you are on the right path...continue no matter who tries to hold you back!
The best thing I ever did was ignore people telling me that I can't, and believe in myself. Don't let the other crabs pull you to your death, focus on what it is you want and make it happen!